If I had any readers I would say sorry it's been a while, but since I don't, well too bad. It's been a very exciting and very scary last couple of weeks. New job is going great but that is about all that is going great. I've never been as down in my life as I have been the last two weeks. It seems that nothing is going the way I envisioned my life being. Not a single damn thing. Some of the things that are wrong I can change, but for the most part the things that are getting to me are the things I can't change, and I can't accept them. I know life is difficult, and you have to make the best out of what you're dealt, but when you've been dealt shit, you can't very well make a castle out of it. So right now I'm pretty much lost. I don't know where I'm going or what I am doing, or how I am feeling. I'm more confused now than I have even been in my life. I need to find a solution soon or I will truly be over the edge. Later.
On a side note, all of you that I have hurt, scared, insulted, or just been a straight up prick to, I apologize.
Sunday, February 27, 2005
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2 comments:
The only person you should apologize to is youself for not taking care of yourself, for not liking yourself, for not seeing anything worthwhile in yourself. You are the person that you hurt, scared, insulted, and just been a straight up prike to the most. Everyone else just gets hurt and scared from seeing it and not being able to do anything about it.
I honestly don't see the things that are upsetting you so bad. I should really talk to you about it, but I don't know what to say. I really think that almost all of your negativity comes from yourself and if you view your life positively, than you will be happy. If you can't see anything positive and life is just dealing you shit, then go ahead an make a shit castle. Do it and feel proud of yourself for it. If that's all you say your given, than that's all you can do right? I don't believe it, but if that's your truth right now, you might as well accept it.
I'm working on it, but it isn't going to be an overnight change. I've found the last week if I stay busy I'm happy. So I'll be taking on a lot of little projects to keep me occupied.
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