On a better note my friend Devin and I cleaned house this year at the moped races. Well not so much me, but Devin. Devin won first in everything, and I placed 4th in my class and 9th overall. Next year will be better. I'll be rockin on a brand new racing machine that will blow all away. Oh yes, it will happen.
That's me #65.
My life seems to have gotten better since my last funk. I haven't had a really depressing day for a few weeks. I've actually been in a great mood for the last week or so. I'll be in a better mood as soon as I can get the hell out of my mothers basement and have a place of my own. It's getting to be so hard to stay there. I mean for god's sake I'm 26 friggin years old, and still live with mommy. That's sad.
I need to get back out on my own and live my life the way I want and not hiding behind the facade I have made for myself. I don't think anyone truly knows who I am. They know Bryan, but they don't know me. I'm not even sure I know me. I'm constantly putting on a front when I'm with people either to cover up how I feel, or to act how I should feel but never do. Eventually it catches up with me and everything goes crazy until I can figure out how to sort it all and clear my thoughts.
I think that's all for today. I've spent a little too much of the company's dime playing around.
5 comments:
Motion Left represent!!
I think that it's a rather difficult goal to be your true self to everyone you meet. I'm not sure if anyone actually does it. Sometimes, I feel that my deepest self only comes out under certain conditions and to certain people. I feel that I have different shells of myself. I use the shells for protection. The more comfortable I feel around you, the more shells you break through.
So, my point is, everyone does it, but I think that it is an amicable goal to be your true self for all of the world to see. Most people, including me, are too scared to do so.
I'm getting better at trying to just do what I feel. I'm working on not ashamed at who I am. I'm cool, and that's how I'm trying to view myself.
You are one cool mamma jamma
you can't remove a comment grrrrr.... :)
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